How I Negotiated My First Job Offer

I tried not to squirm in the orange vinyl seat in the cafeteria as I waited for John. I focused on taking deep breaths to calm the drumbeat of my heart.

I had been interviewing for a role in a different business division within my company. Conversations with John had been going well, and this meeting was to firm up some final details about my transition.

One of those was my compensation.

It hadn’t come up yet and, given this was a new role, I wanted a salary increase. I had a number in mind and, based on negotiation research I had done, I knew I needed to ask for more to create a higher anchor.

I assumed he’d negotiate down and I’d end up with the salary I wanted. I ran my thinking past a trusted friend and got as comfortable as I could, given I was a 20-something-year-old novice facing my first salary negotiation.

At a natural break in the conversation, I braced myself and segued into compensation. I explained how excited I was about the opportunity and my motivation to make an impact quickly in this next phase of my career. And then I shared my anchor salary number.

A knowing smile crossed his face. As the head of sales, he was accustomed to negotiating day in and day out.

My confidence started to waiver as he explained how he viewed this role as a lateral move. He said he could tell from the interview process that I was a go-getter, but that I was unproven. He didn’t feel comfortable increasing my salary without seeing my work.

My heart sank.

But then he said something that blew my mind: “After six months if you do a good job, I’ll give you what you’re asking for.”

Whoa. I hadn’t considered that possibility.

We shook hands on the terms. I walked out of the cafeteria, stunned at the prospect of getting the salary I threw out as my anchor.

I was more determined than ever to prove myself, deliver high-quality work, and make an impact quickly.

John kept his word and I got my increase six months later. I’m forever grateful to him, not only for taking the chance on me but also for the lessons that encounter taught me:

Invest the time to get prepped.

Aside from the basics of researching salary ranges, spend time thinking about how you want the conversation to unfold. Get a friend to help you role play. Salary negotiations can be fraught with emotion and we do them so rarely, so practice and get comfortable saying your number out loud.

Push yourself.

Women (including me) tend to hold themselves back on their compensation goals. One thing I’ve tried to do is come up with my number and then push myself to stretch just a bit higher. I want to get to the spot where I feel uncomfortable.

Get creative.

I never would have thought to make the proposal John suggested. It taught me that there are ways to create win-win scenarios. It takes some openness and a collaborative spirit with the other party.

No just means not now.

In another job transition, the company I was negotiating with couldn’t meet my compensation request. In my conversations, I was gracious yet transparent that I was taking a pay cut to join them. I worked hard to prove my value and in the first review cycle, my boss gave me a sizable increase to close the gap. Sometimes it takes building trust before you can get what you want.

I’m sharing this story because there are far too many women who don’t negotiate. When I was a hiring manager and I extended an offer, I was willing and able to give the candidate more money…if they just asked.

But most of the women didn’t.

They left money on the table. And that always disappointed me. It fueled me to make sure all women recognize they need to negotiate.

That’s part of the reason I offer my clients lifetime access for salary negotiations. Whether it’s 5 months from now or 5 years from now, I want to help you prepare and advocate for the compensation you deserve.

And it’s one small way I can make a dent in the gender pay gap.